King of the Ring (Part 3)
– The announcers speculate on whether or HHH is Vince’s replacement partner. Suddenly, we go TO THE BACK~! where Commissioner HBK is having HHH thrown out of the building for costing Rock the WWF title. Vince is furious because HHH was supposed to be his partner in the main event. It’s such a surprise that HBK literally says “No shit, Sherlock” (for some reason, shit is censored on the network) when Vince tells him
– With Plan B ruined, it’s time for Vince to go to Plan C as he calls someone and tells them to head towards the building right away because he needs them. Also, in a “this shit ain’t real” moment, Rock is just dicking around in the background during the last couple of seconds of this segment despite his nemesis being inches away.
Match #9
KOTR Finals
X-Pac vs. “Mr. Ass” Billy Gunn
– Before coming out to the ring, Mr. Ass cuts a promo backstage with Michael Cole. Gunn outright says that he’s going after Pac’s neck and says that anybody who ain’t down with that can “kiss [his] royal ass.”
– Gunn jumps Pac to start the match and, true to his word, immediately starts working over the face’s neck.
– Pac moves out of the way of a Stinger Splash in the corner and sends Gunn to the outside with a Clothesline. Pac then goes high-risk and goes flying out of the ring with a Plancha onto Gunn!
– Action goes back into the ring as Pac goes flying off the top rope with some form of forearm strike for a two count. Gunn soon bounces back, however, and targets the degenerate neck again with a Bulldog.
– Gunn lifts Pac high into the air before bringing him down with a Gorilla Press Slam.
– How has somebody not booked a feud between Billy Gunn and Gunner? Actually, never mind, I know why. For the sake of humanity.
– Anyhoo, Gunn keeps getting the heat on Pac, putting his size advantage to good use. At one point, he gets a nearfall and insists to the ref that it was three. Mr. Ass screams “bullshit!” he’s so sure of his victory.
– After getting into it with the ref, Gunn turns around into an X-Factor. Pac makes the cover but Mr. Ass somehow kicks out!
– Determined to finish the job, Pac hits Gunn with the Bronco Buster. As he bounces off the ropes to follow up on the teabagging session, the heel catches him with a neckbreaker for a nearfall.
– For a second, Billy Gunn transforms into Ric Flair as he heads to the top rope but gets cut off and crotched. Pac tries to go up top with him but Gunn fights him off and sends him back to the mat. As Pac is getting back up to his feet, Mr. Ass comes off the second rope for a nice looking Fame-Asser for the win. ALL HAIL KING ASS!
– Another nothing match. It wasn’t bad by any means but the action was painfully mediocre.
– Gunn doesn’t even get his crown and sceptre before the camera cuts away to a hype video for the main event. Way to make the entire tournament seem worthless. Some shit happened, a dude won, and now, it’s over. That’s basically what WWF said there.
– A hype video plays recapping the build to the main event. Thank god, it does a much better job explaining what happened than the opening music video did.
– Stephanie McMahon used to be Brie Bella levels of bad. My lord. Pretty girl but she couldn’t act to save her life.
– It’s worth noting that there is a stip of “no Corporate interference” due to Austin beating the Bossman on Raw in the build to this show.
Match #10
Ladder Match
Winner(s) get 100% control of the WWF
Mr. McMahon & ??? vs. “Stone Cold” Steve Austin
WWF in the Bank
– As soon as he gets in the ring, Vince grabs a mic but, much like earlier, can’t even finish a sentence before the “Asshole!” chants start up. “Where’s your Southern hospitality!?”- Vince.
– Vince announces “The Lethal Weapon” Steve Blackman as his partner. Crowd goes mild. lol.
– Uh oh, Spaghetti-O’s. A “GTV” video plays on the titantron showing Shane and The Mean Street Posse cracking jokes about how they totally fooled HBK and how Shane totally isn’t hurt. As Shane is hyping his men up, Pete Gas points out that they are live on the titantron causing them to hilariously storm out of the room.
– Vince has a big “oh shit” look on his face after being exposed.
– Shane and his boys try to leave the building but they are stopped by Commissioner HBK. Shawn orders Shane to go out to the ring for the main event. The commish personally escorts The Boy Wonder out to the ring and tells Blackman to “get his G.I. Joe looking ass to steppin’!” The heels comply with Shawn wishes after he threatens to DQ Vince and Shane and award the win to Austin.
– Glass Shatters and the place goes bananas. Man, they loved the hell out of Austin.
– The bell rings as the McMahons are talking strategy on the outside. Inside the ring, Austin gets tired of their gum-flapping and lays both men out with a Clothesline to a big pop.
– Austin sends Vince back into the ring and starts opening up a Can of Whoop Ass on him. Shane tries to save his daddy but Austin opens up a can on him as well
– Austin drags Vince out of the ring before turning his attention to Shane in the ring. Austin nuts Shane on the ring post and there goes the money.
– Austin chases Vince around the ring which allows Shane to sneak attack him. The McMahons double team Austin for a bit before Vince goes for the ladder. Austin sends Shane into the ring steps before going after Daddy Vince.
– The Rattlesnake makes Vince go under a ladder before throwing him into the set. Shane climbs the ladders that are part of the set on the stage to try and get away from this crazed redneck but Austin needs to beat some ass for the working man. He climbs onto the ladder contraption before tossing Shane off. Austin gives the crowd the two-finger salute to a big pop.
– Austin is going HAM on the heels and tossing them into a bunch of ladders. Eventually, he causes the entire ladder thingy on the stage to collapse on the McMahons.
– Austin drags a ladder back to the ring but the McMahons are hot on his trail. They follow him into the ring but Austin disposes of them with the ladder. Shane takes a ridiculous bump over the commentary booth.
– Austin goes to the outside and throws Shane on the Spanish Announce Table. He climbs a ladder and comes off with it a Forearm to break the table.
– The Not-Quite-Bionic Redneck climbs out of the wreckage and once again goes up the ladder on the outside. There, he meets Vince who gets knocked off after a brief exchange but gets the last laugh by knocking the ladder over causing Austin to crash onto the other announce table (didn’t break). Damn, that looked rough.
– LOL, King’s headset temporarily breaks. His voice is soon restored and he goes right back to McMahon dick-riding.
– Vince goes for the briefcase in the ring but Austin stops him with a jab to the ball sack. Austin starts slamming Vince’s face into the ladder while they are both still on it. After seeing his dad get tossed off the ladder, Shane goes after Austin but he immediately gets dropped.
– This is actually kinda fun so far.
– Austin rams the ladder into Shane’s ribs while he is in the corner before throwing Vince into him.
– Austin might as well piss on them at this point.
– After murking Vince and Shane for a while, Austin finally tries to win the match and grab the briefcase. Unfortunately for him, Vince stops him by tipping the ladder over.
– With the ladder out of reach, Shane hilariously hops on his dad’s shoulder to try and grab the case. Austin goes “lolno” though and makes the tower collapse.
– Just for good measure, Austin lays out both of his opponents with Stunners before going the case and the win. Right when he’s about to get it, however, the case is…raised higher? Possibly thinking that his eyes are deceiving him, Austin reaches for the case again only for it to be raised higher! THE FIX IS IN, BROTHER.
– A furious Austin starts threatening ringside staff to figure out who screwed him over (SPOILER: It was Big Bossman) which gives Vince enough time to go for the case. Austin, upon seeing this, casually strolls into the ring to stop him. Seriously, considering that the ownership of the company was on the line, Austin had no urgency in his walk.
– It’s truly a battle of good and evil as Austin and Vince battle on top of the ladder. Austin briefly manages to fight both McMahons off and almost reaches the case (before it’s raised higher, of course) before Shane decides to sacrifice his own father by knocking over the ladder, sending both men crashing to the mat. Shane climbs the ladder as the case is literally lowered into his hands. The McMahons win it!
– The victorious baddies celebrate on the ramp as Austin tells them to sit and spin. Fun main event to close out the show. The only good thing on this show and even then, it wasn’t amazing or anything.
Boy, this show was some bullshit. I thought Wrestlemania XV was bad. That, at least, had two good matches on it. The only thing on this show that was enjoyable was the main event. Kane/Big Show was horrendous and looking back at my recap of it, Rock/Taker was way worse than I initially thought it was. I was, in fact, being way too nice to that match, it was complete ass. Everything else on this show was so…nothing. No match on the undercard was given room to breathe. Easily the worst show I’ve done so far in this series. The KOTR itself was pretty damn bad. Not a single match other than Chyna/Road Dogg went longer than seven minutes. About half of the matches were less than four minutes.
Match of the Night: Steve Austin vs. The McMahons
Worst Match of the Night: Big Show vs. Kane (Rock/Taker was a very close second)
Updated Rankings:
1. The Rock vs. Mankind (Royal Rumble, WWF title, I-Quit match)
2. The Rock vs. Mankind (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, WWF title, Last Man Standing)
3. The Rock vs. Stone Cold (Backlash, WWF title, No Holds Barred w/ special ref Shane McMahon)
4. X-Pac vs. Shane McMahon (WM XV, European title)
5. The Rock vs. Stone Cold (WM XV, WWF title, No-Disqualification)
6. The Rock vs. HHH (Over the Edge)
7. Steve Austin vs. The McMahons (King of the Ring, Winner(s) gain 100% control of the WWF, Ladder match)
8. HHH vs. X-Pac (Backlash)
9. Kane & X-Pac vs. Mark Henry & D-Lo Brown (Over the Edge, WWF Tag Team titles)
10. Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, I-C title, Special Ref: Billy Gunn)
11. D-Lo Brown & Mark Henry vs. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, Tag Team titles)
12. Kane & Chyna vs. HHH & X-Pac (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre)
13. Bob Holly vs. Al Snow (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, Hardcore title, Hardcore match)
14. New Age Outlaws vs. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (Backlash, Winners become #1 Contenders to tag titles)
15. Big Show vs. Mankind (Backlash, Boiler Room Brawl)
16. Billy Gunn vs. Ken Shamrock (Royal Rumble, I-C title)
17. Al Snow vs. Hardcore Holly vs. Billy Gunn (WM XV, Hardcore title, Hardcore match)
18. X-Pac vs. Gangrel (Royal Rumble, European title)
1. X-Pac vs. Billy Gunn (King of the Ring, KOTR Final)
18. Road Dogg vs. The Big Bossman (Royal Rumble)
19. Kane vs. HHH (WM XV)
20. Road Dogg vs. Chyna (King of the Ring, KOTR Quarter-Final)
21. Bart Gunn vs. Butterbean (WM XV, Brawl 4 All)
22. Al Snow vs. Hardcore Holly (Backlash, Hardcore title, Hardcore match)
23. D-Lo Brown & Test vs. Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (WM XV, Tag Team titles)
24. Ken Shamrock vs. Billy Gunn (King of the Ring, KOTR Quarter-Final)
25. Road Dogg vs. X-Pac (King of the Ring, KOTR Semi-Final)
26. The Brood (Edge & Christian) vs. The Hardy Boys (King of the Ring, Winners become #1 contenders to the tag titles)
27. Val Venis vs. Ken Shamrock vs. Goldust vs. Road Dogg (WM XV, I-C title, Elimination Fatal Four Way)
28. The Union vs. The Corporate Ministry (Over the Edge, Elimination 8-Man tag)
29. Goldust vs. The Godfather (Backlash, I-C title)
30. Kane vs. Billy Gunn (King of the Ring, KOTR Semi-Final)
31. Al Snow vs. Hardcore Holly (Over the Edge, Hardcore title, Hardcore match)
32. Val Venis & Nicole Bass vs. Jeff Jarrett & Debra (Over the Edge)
33. The Brood vs. The Ministry of Darkness (Backlash, Six man tag)
34. The Big Bossman vs. The Undertaker (WM XV, Hell in a Cell)
35. Hardcore Holly vs. X-Pac (King of the Ring, KOTR Quarter-Final)
36. The Big Bossman vs. Mideon (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre)
37. Mankind vs. Big Show (WM XV, Winner refs main event)
38. Royal Rumble Match (Royal Rumble)
39. Stone Cold vs. Vince McMahon (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre, Steel Cage, if Austin won, he got a WWF title match at WM XV)
40. Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg (Over the Edge)
41. Stone Cold vs. The Undertaker (Over the Edge, WWF title, Special refs: Vince & Shane McMahon)
42. Ken Shamrock vs. The Undertaker (Backlash)
43. Sable vs. Luna (Royal Rumble, Women’s title, Strap match)
44. The Rock vs. The Undertaker (King of the Ring, WWF title)
45. Goldust vs. “Bluedust” (St. Valentine’s Day Massacre)
46. Kane vs. Big Show (King of the Ring, KOTR Quarter-Final)
47. Sable vs. Tori (WM XV, Women’s title)