**Today’s guest columnist is Andrew Hersh, a man known throughout the land as a wrestling aficianado and a master of the SNES, or so his Twitter handle (@SNESmaster) proclaims!
In the mystical realm of the Internet, people are bound to sell their schlocky chotchkies. Most however, do not expect a person of famous stature to do so. Enter Richard Morgan Fleihr. Known to most as “Ric Flair”, he is arguably one of the most popular wrestlers of all time. Wrestling in both major companies (World Wrestling Entertainment and World Championship Wrestling), he has won several world heavyweight titles. He retired in 2008 from the WWE after losing a match to Shawn Michaels…and than, the boa hit the fan.
You see, once Flair retired, he ran into many personal problems. He has been married and divorced several times since then. He also has gotten into many financial problems, mostly through endorsing companies that seem shady. So to raise money, Flair has turned to the people have helped paid for him in the past, the fans. Through his website, he sells many memorabilia items. A lot of them however once you take a closer look, are huge ripoffs. Below are five of the most ridiculous items on his site
Item #1: Reasonably price photo with odd personalization price
Yes, you see this right. For Ric to sign the photo it is $29.99, which is very reasonable for an entertainer like him. For the whole price and one cent more, he will write your name. Even Baseball athletes aren’t this greedy.
Item #2: Signed trading card that looks like it was done in “The Print Shop”
Here we have a trading card. Flair has been featured on a lot of professional trading cards but since he absolutely doesn’t have the license to them, he has to resort to some amateur make one up. Seriously, I could probably do better than this and I have hardly any graphic designing experience.
Item #3: Lottery ticket that has been voided but signed by Flair
This is quite possibly one of the most amazingly bad things I have ever seen sold. It’s bad enough that buying a $5 scratch off can result in no profit but to have it voided, signed by Flair and than have him charge almost $25 more is ludicrious. Oh and for $30 more, you can have it personalized!
Item #4: Ric Flair Halloween costume that doesn’t look like Mr. Flair at all
That’s right! For only $250, you too can (somewhat kinda) look like the man himself. You’ll be the hit at the Halloween party when you knock on your friends apartment door and they answer with, “Hey, you kinda look like an amateur pervert!” Oh but the belt is signed because when you are wearing a Halloween costume item, you have to flaunt your autograph hobby along with it too.
Item #5: Ric Flair is lonely and wants you to talk to him!
Look at the amazing bargains here! For just about $100 a minute, you can talk to the man himself (5 minute max). I could probably ring up any escort service, pay $5 a minute for as long as I want and odds are still good I could end up talking to a lady who was at one time in the wrestling industry. There are also video chats for $200 a minute but it warns that there is an “additional charge for recording in advance”. I’m still trying to figure that out. It also warns that if “In the event client engages in inappropriate behavior or language, celebrity has the right to terminate the Skype session”. I’d be more willing to bet that Flair will end up committing lewd behavior far before you do (search out “Plane ride to hell” for more on that).
In short, do not buy anything from here. Flair has shown that he can squander money faster then he makes it.