Pikachu really let himself go.
Now most of you pokemon fans out there may know of the countless scenes and even episodes of Pokémon that never made it over here in America. Such as James boobs and a guy pointing a gun in Ash’s face in almost every scene(honestly, I think the little bastard deserves it).But did you know that there are also pokemon themselves that have not been seen even within Japan? Well let’s take a look at the offenders list. Here are 25 rejected Pokémon.
- Ottid- A Pokémon that looks like Ditto but has the opposite powers, which is being able to stay exactly the same.
- Monflick-Able to throw its own feces at the speed of bullets. Evolves from Mankey if you use the brown stone.
- Weewacka-Works great against plant Pokémon.
- A’flamath- Is out, loud, and proud to be a Pokémon.
- Bleep-Cannot say its own name.
- Petapet-Refuses to be captured and throws blood at Pokémon you own. Also shows you pics of scantily clad women for no good reason.
- Bulimee-Fires finger projectiles at an opponent’s uvula.
- Depresso- Shoots razor leaf attack, but at its own wrist. Hates the fact that its name sounds like something at starbucks.
- Markofabe- Believes wrestling is real and will fight with those moves.
- TaiHen- A species similar to tentacruel, but only fights female Pokémon.
- Bongo – Fight his best on April the 20th.
- Hipstorr – Only fights when absolutely no one else is fighting.
He's only in this tournament ironically.
- Chikara – Has the ability to be both a Pokémon and wrestling organization
- Gigoloo – Will fight great in a match, but you have to pay.
- Moe – Has the double ability to be a Simpsons character or a cute Japanese character.
- Blindee – Will try to get into tennis balls as if they were pokeballs.
- Werteamu – Alternates between having a hairy body and having smooth muscles.
- Vampteamu – Has the ability to sparkle.
- Pissoff – Specializes in killing Werteamu and Vampteamu.
- Pedodo – A bird type of Pokémon that knows a large amount of Pokémon trainers are children, and absolutely loves it.
- Lolee – A type of Pokémon that knows a large amount of Pokémon players are older men, and absolutely loves it.
The previous two jokes deserve this image somehow.
- Apatho – Will do its best in a Pokémon match…..tomorrow.
- Shia LaBeouf– Not a Pokémon, but then again he’s an expert on forcing his way into places he doesn’t belong to.
- Kamikazz – Likes to give hugs, and then explode.
- Chasheen – Is a rock type Pokémon from mars.
Along with the pokemon themselves, we also got some gym leaders that didn’t quite make the cut.
Ron: A former actor of adult films who decided to stop beating off and start beating opponents. You don’t wanna touch those pokeballs.
Bay: Most of his pokemon use explosions. Even while not in battle. His Pokémon specialize in attacking your childhood.
Vick: Umm,…yeah, you probably won’t like what he does to Evee and it’s other forms.
That is Nintendo’s unaired dirty laundry on Pokémon. This was originally gonna be about Digimon, but I quickly discovered that shit is perfect even in the planning stages. Until next time.
Here’s a pic of Hogan and Pikachu to send us off.
Ps. the title image is from Senki Zesshou Symphogear. So there, don’t ask.
About the author: Glitch is a digital demon from planet Fanboy, and is here to teach us humans a thing or two. You can find more of his reviews(and nonsense) over at http://www.youtube.com/takenoutofcontext.
Weewacka-Works great against plant Pokémon.