After a few troubling weeks of the PlayStation Network acting like a flaky significant other (“I’ll be back this weekend, I swear!”), our favorite free service is up and running…or at least partially. As of this writing, there is still no way to buy anything from the PSN store. Thankfully, I am a spoiled first world problem kinda guy, so I was able to head over to my 360 and play the games that will eventually hit the store when everything is in order. Here’s what you should buy when you get a chance, and what games I think are the best bet for the “guys, we are TOTES sorry about this whole thing!” package.
Outland – Ubisoft/Housemarque, $9.99
There was a moment in Outland where I had to break a wall. I noticed a little device that dropped bombs onto the ground near this wall, so I walked up to it, waited for the bomb to drop, swung my sword, and it was immediately lobbed into the stone wall like an explosive baseball, blowing all the debris away. There is nothing particularly innovative or ground-breaking about this little puzzle, but it just felt damn good.
Outland is one of those games that takes great concepts from other games and makes them feel like its own. Your main character runs, slides, jumps, and swings his sword with the finesse of Strider, and the way he animates amid the gorgeous backgrounds reminded me of the first time I saw my character climb up a ledge in Flashback. It looks that good. It takes just a little while of tutorial-izing you through the world before you even uncover the core mechanic of the game: switching your characters color. It’s impossible to talk about this game and not mention Treasure’s famous shooter, Ikaruga; the polarity system is almost identical. When you’re red, red things don’t hurt you, but you can only defeat blue things, and vice versa. The shape of the bullets and the patterns they come in even seem like an homage, to be completely honest. The difference here is that Outland is–somehow–a bullet-hell platformer. In a Metroid world.
"YO IS THIS THE RAVE?"
That last part surprised me, too. The game was never billed as the “Metroidvania” type, but it actually has some roots there. While it’s not as completely reliant on going back in the world to find that certain power-up to let you through the next level, you will have to do that if you want to find extra shreds of health and various other hidden abilities that, honestly, you’re probably going to need if you want to finish this game, considering how batshit hard it gets near the end. The game does do a good job of implementing your newest power into the next area of the world, though, so you will feel like you know exactly how to control your character to his full extent before you reach the last boss. And those bosses? Pretty impressive:
This golem got his hand stuck in an ancient Pringles can. Now you must fight him.
Outland is just a joy to play, even if you do need to stop to collect your breath during some of the final bits. Considering there’s a good 10 hours of gameplay plus an online co-op mode, you really can’t pass it up for only ten bucks.
Might and Magic: Clash of Heroes HD – Ubisoft/Capybara, $14.99
This actually came out before PSN went down, but seemed to only generate some word-of-mouth buzz, despite how well-received the original DS version of the game was. You may know Capybara Games from their last PSN title, Critter Crunch, which made me think these guys were really good puzzle game designers. Clash of Heroes makes me think these people are beyond just “really good.” It’s more like I would now buy a lifetime subscription to any puzzle games these guys touch. I’ll even cancel my Omaha steaks for them.
The most complicated road block of all time.
Clash of Heroes is part tactical RPG, part puzzle game, and part pissing of people who are WAY too into the Might and Magic fiction. Seriously, don’t come here for story or anything. While you will go around towns and talk to people, the real meat of the game is in the actual “battles” themselves, which unfold in a turn-based puzzle game manner, a bit similar to how Puzzle Quest worked, but with a more nuanced puzzle game instead of it just being, well, Bejewled with skulls. Matching units in a column of the same color queue them up for attack, while lining them up in a row makes a protective wall. Some units take longer than others to attack, and some giant units, like Griffons or Death Knights (whatever those may be) require you to match more units into them in order to activate.
Run! That guy has anime claws!
Like most good things, it sounds complicated when explained to you, but makes total sense when you actually do it. The game also does an admirable job of explaining how to play, with the first chapter acting as mostly a tutorial. There’s not much else to say about this game, and while that may sound like an insult, it’s anything but. The puzzle mechanics are so good here that it’s like telling someone why they should go play a game of Tetris Attack or something. While the story is mostly window dressing, there’s enough funny dialogue to make you not want to skip it, and the animations during battle look so great you never mind seeing the same thing twice. On top of the story mode, the game features quick battle and both local and online multiplayer. Considering each chapter gives you a different character to play as with different units under their command, you could play this game for a good 40 hours. Go buy this game.
See, this cloud started raining on this brick wall, and then these arrows took your credit cards.
One last note: Sony is offering a “Welcome Back” package which contains free games to all PSN owners. Many are wondering which they should get, while others are yelling that they already own them all. If you do not own any of these games, here’s a very quick rundown:
Infamous: Superheroes, lightning. Good time except for shitty sidekick. Get this first.
LittleBigPlanet: Sack things! Twee British voices going “IDDNIT?!” Fun, but the sequel is out now, and it’s hard to go back. A fine second choice if you can’t afford the new one.
Wipeout HD: If you have even a passing interest in racing, snatch this right up. Then put on your Prodigy CD and “do the dew.”
Super Stardust HD: Fantastic dual stick shooter, probably the best on PS3. Perhaps the best Geometry Wars clone out there.
Dead Nation: This is what you get when you find a stranger in the alps have everything else and want a free game. Not terrible, but there’s better out there.
I’m glad we all made it through this unscathed and with free shit. Now we can all go back to being called horribly racist terms by xXbigPHILLYbluntrolla420Xx.