Dear Zack,
I’m Dan Lashley, cofounder of the very site you have someone reading, because your glorious peepers need to focus on more important things…like yourself. I normally don’t make a habit of personally pointing one person out, but I would be remiss if I didn’t share with you a little story.
I was born way back in 1977. Disco was king…Star Wars was teaching people that you need to shoot first, and there were a few other things I don’t remember. I’m not even sure why I posted this information, since the story happens a few years later. I just wanted you to know.
Fast forward to a few years later…I visit my Grandpa in rural Kentucky when I was 5. How rural? We were out in the middle of the woods rural. We had to go outside to pee. The banjo boy from Deliverance was our neighbor. Anyway, I was always my Grandpa’s favorite. He would sit me on his knee and tell me about the Depression, and about how hard he had to work on a 4th grade education. Then he’d tell me to get off his knee cause I was a chubby kid and I was breaking his leg.
Not shown, Ned Beatty
Well on this trip, Grandpa was sick and in bed. As I stood by his side, he woke up and looked at me. With tears in his eye and with his dying breath, he told me something that would change my life forever. This is what he said:
“Boy, my time is a comin’ to a close, but yer life is jus’ beginnin’. There’s gonna be all sorts of obstackles to face, and sometimes yer gonna feel like jus’ a givin’ up, but I want you to look deep inside yerself…and think to yourself, ‘What would Zack Ryder do?’ . If you follow Zack, you kin be whateva you want to be. Woo woo *cough cough* Woo…you know it.”
He coughed for a few minutes, and spoke his ever last words…”Take care…and..and spike yer hair”.
Then he died.
I’ve followed those words ever since. Sure you weren’t even born yet, and my efforts to spike my hair ended up with me bald, but that’s not the point. The point is, we at the Freakin Awesome Network support you and feel we should be Broski of the Week. Our forum is chock full of message board Zack Packers who follow the almost Zen like Zack with religious fervor.
Things our FANtastic Message Board Members have done:
Made Zack signs for WWE events
Make Zack sigs on the board
Followed @ZackRyder on the Twitters
Made over 400 life sized cutouts of Zack Ryder and staged Zackamania in his living room. (You won, by the way)
So in closing, Zack, Zack’s Dad, person reading this outloud to Zack…please, give the Freakin Awesome Network a chance to share the Zack love with the rest of the world.
Make us Broski of the week. I might have a couple bucks in my pocket. Let me check…
..I’ll get back to you on that.
Sincerely,
Dan Lashley
Freakin Awesome Network
P.S. I made this for you.
